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What Do You Want?

Well? What do you want?

Sometimes when I work with my coaching clients, one of the things we have to do is really discuss what their actual goals are. Not what they think their goals are, what they really are.

It’s important because once you get going on a project you don’t want to be distracted, or worse taken off on tangents, because what you are working towards is at odds with your actual goals.

Here is one example. A business is there to make money, right? Seems obvious. Have you noticed how some CEOs crave publicity and fame? Daredevil stunts or dressing up in costumes for publicity. Constant interviews and media appearances. Could it be the stated goal is money but the activities are more in line with using the business as a vehicle to achieve fame?

On a smaller level this is the equivalent of saying you want to maintain a close relationship with your clients but then fixate about winning trade awards. Or perhaps you launch a blog for your own interest then obsess about getting linked by the A-List.

You can tell if your conscious and subconscious goals are out of whack by sitting down quietly and think about your actions and where they are leading.  Where is your focus? Are you always looking to your peers or do you listen to your customers and audience? Is it your own drives and ideas in charge or are you crowd-pleasing? Do your priorities reflect what you think is right or what you are told?

It could be the one greatest change you can make towards achieving your goals is to work out what they really are and start working towards them!

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Comments

  1. Seriously, what could be a personal blogger’s goal? I’ve been thinking about this but never seem to find an answer to it..

  2. Seriously, what could be a personal blogger’s goal? I’ve been thinking about this but never seem to find an answer to it..

  3. It’s interesting that what you’re really getting at is why someone would establish a goal in the first place. Is it because we think the goal is appropriate or achievable? Is it based on ideas or information about what others want, rather than what we ourselves want?

    I’m constantly reevaluating my goals against the importance of sticking with something and not changing it too much, which is a mistake I’ve made in the past and don’t want to repeat. My danger is that I would too easily alter my goals. My biggest lesson in what I’m doing now is to not change them!

  4. It’s interesting that what you’re really getting at is why someone would establish a goal in the first place. Is it because we think the goal is appropriate or achievable? Is it based on ideas or information about what others want, rather than what we ourselves want?

    I’m constantly reevaluating my goals against the importance of sticking with something and not changing it too much, which is a mistake I’ve made in the past and don’t want to repeat. My danger is that I would too easily alter my goals. My biggest lesson in what I’m doing now is to not change them!

  5. Intention – I was channel surfing the other day and Oprah said that it changed her life when someone told her the secret to understanding you actions is to look at your intentions. The more you analyze why you want to do or why you did something, the more you will see yourself.

    If you look at what you really want, your intention becomes clearer. Sometimes it is embarrassing to realize that you were just looking to draw attention to yourself. I have been meaning to blog about this for a week or so. Just had other topics get in the way.

  6. Intention – I was channel surfing the other day and Oprah said that it changed her life when someone told her the secret to understanding you actions is to look at your intentions. The more you analyze why you want to do or why you did something, the more you will see yourself.

    If you look at what you really want, your intention becomes clearer. Sometimes it is embarrassing to realize that you were just looking to draw attention to yourself. I have been meaning to blog about this for a week or so. Just had other topics get in the way.

  7. @pelf – Sometimes to just share thoughts, sometimes to keep family and friends in the loop, mine is all that plus to just post silly stuff that I find so I don’t lose it

    @Roger – That’s pretty much what I was thinking, if you work back from your actions sometimes it is clear what you say you are trying to do and what you are actually doing are not the same things. Other times we get stuck in patterns of behaviors and forget why we started doing those things in the first place!

  8. @pelf – Sometimes to just share thoughts, sometimes to keep family and friends in the loop, mine is all that plus to just post silly stuff that I find so I don’t lose it

    @Roger – That’s pretty much what I was thinking, if you work back from your actions sometimes it is clear what you say you are trying to do and what you are actually doing are not the same things. Other times we get stuck in patterns of behaviors and forget why we started doing those things in the first place!

  9. You been listening to deepak chopra No?, well you should, the seven spiritual laws as well as creating affluence audio pack is just awesome he covers exactly what you’re getting at. Man I’m in the custom home building business, I really wish that the majority of customers would figure out what they want. Seriously though…. I think at somepoint everyone has to do a gut check and figure out what it is they really want. If it doesnt feel good dont do it. If you dont know what to do ask the universe it will tell you, this is how I solve problems when Im working: when I “get stuck in a problem” I go for a walk have a smoke divorce my self from the situation, and after a few minutes of cooling off,A solution presents itself. Usually the problem is that I “really dont want to be doing what Im doing”. Gut check time…
    But it’s labour day here In canada and Im off to the pub
    Cheers and Beers from Canada
    Shane

  10. You been listening to deepak chopra No?, well you should, the seven spiritual laws as well as creating affluence audio pack is just awesome he covers exactly what you’re getting at. Man I’m in the custom home building business, I really wish that the majority of customers would figure out what they want. Seriously though…. I think at somepoint everyone has to do a gut check and figure out what it is they really want. If it doesnt feel good dont do it. If you dont know what to do ask the universe it will tell you, this is how I solve problems when Im working: when I “get stuck in a problem” I go for a walk have a smoke divorce my self from the situation, and after a few minutes of cooling off,A solution presents itself. Usually the problem is that I “really dont want to be doing what Im doing”. Gut check time…
    But it’s labour day here In canada and Im off to the pub
    Cheers and Beers from Canada
    Shane

  11. Yes that’s right, but sometimes it’s not that easy to manage a way between conscious and unconscious goals!

  12. Yes that’s right, but sometimes it’s not that easy to manage a way between conscious and unconscious goals!

  13. @shane – I haven’t checked out Deepak Chopra as yet but I intend to 🙂

    @BlogOxide – It’s not always easy but in most cases if we think about it we can get an idea which we are actually working towards.

  14. @shane – I haven’t checked out Deepak Chopra as yet but I intend to 🙂

    @BlogOxide – It’s not always easy but in most cases if we think about it we can get an idea which we are actually working towards.